Are you a top, a bottom, or versatile? While there are certainly some pointers and facts for a top, a bottom has a whole different ball game to deal with in the sack. Tops can just show up and go, but it’s not quite the same for bottoms. Bottoming can be tricky for some, so The Homo Life’s developed a quick guide to bottoming for anyone out there who has yet to take the bottoming plunge.
Preparation is the most important step for a bottom. You take time to do your hair and pick your outfit, so you should also take time to prepare your sphincter. Many bottoms debate over douching, but some kind of cleaning is definitely appreciated. Prior to meeting up with your top, either douche, use an enema (neither of these should be done daily) or simply sit in a soap free bathtub and clean the area. Do not ever use soap to clean yourself with as this can cause massive irritation.
You should also consider your grooming habits. Everyone has their own preferences, but it’s important to note that shaving shouldn’t be done right before fucking. Tears from the razor have the potential to spread/contract infections and diseases and your ass could be irritated by the potential razor burn. When it comes to manscaping, try to think ahead and do it a day or so before hand.
If you’re completely new to the bottoming game, you should also prep yourself (this doesn’t necessarily have to be done beforehand, this can be ongoing). By prepping yourself, I mean you should practice on relaxing and getting a finger or toy inside of yourself. Get in the bathtub if you find you’re having trouble. If you want to practice stretching and taking more, head over to Adam and Eve and pick up an anal dildo, a vibrator, or butt plug. These can help you practice taking on more and help you get used to the sensation before you’re face with a real dick.
Relaxing is one of the most important aspects of being a bottom. You won’t be able to make any progress if you don’t relax. Center yourself, let everything go and breathe. You might not even realize that your muscles are tensing up, so focus on releasing everything, even if you have to go muscle group to muscle group. Your partner needs to be patient with you at this point. Do not rush this process.
Using lube is just as important as relaxing. While relaxing will allow you to be penetrated, lube will help make things much easier, slicker, and more enjoyable. Whether you’re pairing it with a condom or not, even though I strongly suggest that you use a condom, you will want to stick to either silicone or water-based lubricant. Make sure you avoid using oil-based lube, as this will breakdown a condom and can cause infections. Only use oil-based lube for solo play. Silicone lube is probably going to be your best choice because it tends to be slicker and stays on longer since it’s water-resistant.
Working on positions is something that may help you gain access, but also might be best left to when you’ve actually seen success and figured out what works best for you. Check out this (NSFW!) sex positions list to get some new ideas once you’ve mastered, or at least grown comfortable with, bottoming.
This kind of goes back to the prepping section. Continue to train on your own by using toys and by practicing your kegels. Kegels are exercises for your PC muscles and while they are commonly thought of as strictly genital muscles, they are also in your ass. When you flex your PC muscles, you should feel a tightening in your genitals and in your sphincter. Performing these exercises can help you strengthen your muscles and gain more control over them. Here’s a helpful guide on how to find your PC muscles.
And finally, remember that practice makes perfect and can be super fun. You don’t need to be fucking a guy to have anal fun! Just keep relaxing, keep breathing and you’ll get there be the best bottom in town in no time..
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image via Flickr user dctim1