19 Gay Wishes For 2013

While everyone else on the planet is making New Year’s resolutions to eat right, exercise, and be less of a dick, I’d rather make some fag-ulous wishes for 2013 and display my gay hopes and dreams on somewhat of a digital inspiration board. I’m going to think of it like The Secret: if we stare at this article every day in 2013, it’s all bound to come true, right?

Let’s get started!

Snooki Excited

 

In 2013 I wish, dream, and hope that…

  1. baby Kimye won’t just look like a baby version of Kanye West.
  2. Lindsay Lohan will realize she has yet to hit rock bottom and signs a deal for a reality TV show.
  3. Rihanna will take a fucking vacation and not release a new album.
  4. we can stop saying slay, kiki, stan, and shade.
  5. Beyonce’s upcoming album (and Super Bowl performance!), Lady Gaga’s ARTPOP, and Britney Spear’s new music will all be as fab as can be.
  6. homophobes will stop making such a big deal about gay marriage.
  7. Bethenny Frankel will grace our small screens with a 3rd season of Bethenny Ever After.
  8. Rebel Wilson will star in every single movie.
  9. Andy Cohen will give himself a dating show to find find the best twink in America to take his hand in gaaaaayyyy marriage.
  10. Grindr will create a “block all ugly guys” button.
  11. Tom Daley will come out of the closet.
  12. someone will make a One Direction gay porn parody.
  13. LMFAO will be put in jail.
  14. an American version of 1 Girl 5 Gays will come to MTV.
  15. everyone will stop taking selfies.
  16. a fast food chain will come out in support of equality, giving us all an excuse to eat fattening, shitty, AMAZING food whenever we want.
  17. Zayn Malik will be my boyfriend.
  18. Skinnygirl will be sold in 20-ounce bottles in every bodega in New York City.
  19. there will be a “gay Real Housewives” reality show that doesn’t suck.

 

Lea Black shot

 

What are your gay wishes for 2013? Let me know in the comment section below!

More from The Homo Life:

39 Signs You’re A Twink

5 Words That Need To Be Banned From The Gay Dictionary

39 Things Basic Bitches Love

5 Books Every Twink Needs To Read

images via RealityTVGifs

About Alex Hughes

Alex Hughes (Founder and Editor-in-chief) grew up in the Bible Belt and now lives in New York City. He is also an Assistant Editor at The Faster Times and Faster Times Media, as well as a contributor to SLC Speaks. You can follow him on Twitter @TheAlexHughes or e-mail him at